"wrong, yet so right"

different meaning,
different seeing.
I know what 
is right.

One looks sweet,
one looks just.
Must not I repeat,
is my pain a must?

I follow clear, 
I follow haze.
Lose I all dear,
like lost in a maze.

I lose what I want,
I get something else.
though memory serves,
such more I become.

lose all, gain some.
swap this, take that.
my heart leaves with none,
my brain grossly fat.

when shall it end,
when find I release.
joy, have I not,
rather some peace.